Tuesday, March 11, 2008

End of the Saga

I am hoping that this is the last post on the state of my health. I can't seem to find a way of framing what is happening to me in a manner that takes in the broader issues of class and income. It seems petty to whine about the time, the expense, the stupid lectures when there are so many people in the United States without access to decent health insurance and/or reliable doctors.

Except I could not turn off the interior monologue, which became louder when the forms to appeal company X's refusal to approve a chest CT scan arrived in the mail. Seeing the phrase “suspected malignancy” in print is demoralizing. Waiting for information on procedures is demoralizing.

The arguments with Insurance Company X over which procedures are medically necessary, the trips for consults, MRI's and CT scans, the lecture from my mother over refusing contrast, all of this is making me weary. In between I've also had annual visits to the dentist and the optometrist and a consult with a periodontist. I have spent more time in medical offices in the past six weeks then I have in the last ten years.

It is not over quite yet, but it is close. My scans are normal. My blood work is normal. My x-rays are normal. I have orders for physical therapy on my left shoulder, to strengthen the tendon. I have an estimate for two gum grafts, to fix the recession on two of my teeth. And I have a GP who thinks that I have been through enough – and that I am normal.

2 comments:

  1. Jen, I'm sorry you have been left to wonder about the state of your health . . . there is nothing more scary than that! Here's to finding out soon that everything is okay!

    Hugs,
    Lisa

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  2. Health insurance or not, there is a helpless feeling in not knowing what is going and being herded through tests and doctors' offices.

    Incidentally, physical therapy was emotionally healing for me, because it made me feel like I could regain some control over this aging bag of bones I call a body.

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